In 2019, Charlotte, a healthcare assistant, found herself struggling to cope.
“I'd had a pretty normal day. I'd been at home with my son. I was getting ready for the night shift. I just started feeling overwhelmed. I was going through a lot at the time. My son had just got an epilepsy diagnosis, so I'd been fighting for a year with this, and he was having a lot of seizures at the time that were uncontrolled. I was living with my ex-husband, but we were separating.
I felt my mood fluctuate quite quickly and my decision to end my life came suddenly."
My kids have always been my safety net. So, it surprised me on that day that I felt so low and, in the end, it was a snap decision. I was feeling really upset on the way to work and I had my music on, I suppose I was just in my own head, and then everything just sort of escalated. I just thought that my son is three and is therefore young enough to start again and he won't even remember a life with me in it.
Charlotte
"He's got his dad, he'll be OK. That was it, that was enough for me, and I just thought it'll be fine. That could have been the day that everything changed forever. But then Dave asked if I was OK."
Dave says:
“When I first approached Charlotte, I was very aware that obviously there was somebody there who was very vulnerable. I stood a little bit back from her so as not to get into her space, I just needed to get that conversation flowing and find a way. I introduced myself and asked if she was having a bad day. She wasn't really talking at that time, she just nodded her head. I got down to her level but sat a good distance away from her. I made general conversation, just to diffuse the situation and get Charlotte talking.”
Charlotte says:
“Having somebody that I didn't know, just come and sit with me and have a normal conversation. When there was so much chaos going on inside my head, it was enough to make me feel not as overwhelmed.
There was a completely different outcome that day because he took the time to just come and talk to me. My 3-year-old would've not had a mum. When you’re suicidal, time isn’t on your side. Tomorrow would have been too late for me. In that moment, Dave was the person I needed, I’m so thankful I got the help I needed, when I needed it. And I know Samaritans offers that same lifeline every day for people who feel suicidal."
I’ve called Samaritans myself in the past and again that human connection helped me get through my darkest times. I always say their helpline is a lifesaving piece of equipment. It’s a defibrillator for emotions. That’s how important it is. I was fighting for my life, and Samaritans brought me out of crisis.
Charlotte
"The first time I called, it was the middle of the night. I find that if my mental health isn’t good, I can’t sleep. My thoughts won’t let me rest. But the lady at Samaritans gave me all the time I needed. She completely empathised with me and gave me a listening ear. I hadn’t felt there was anyone in my life I could tell how I was feeling. But the volunteer sat with me in my pain.
That call helped me see my life completely differently. Knowing there is a helpline you can ring, and that someone will give you that compassion and empathy, means everything."
I know that sometimes one conversation is all it takes to save a life. Before I spoke to Dave, I had convinced myself that my son would be better off without me. But sitting there with Dave was enough to help me break out of that feeling. I reached out to thank him through social media, we stayed in touch afterwards, and years later we’re actually married with a family.
Charlotte
"On that day, Dave saved my life. And speaking to Samaritans was just as powerful. These conversations make you feel you’re not alone."
