Qasim’s story

In 2016, I remember being in a really tough situation – it was awful, and at the time felt everlasting. When I think about the future now, I can think about what my life is going to be like, where I’m going to live and what I’m going to do. But back then I could not see anything, it was just black. There was literally no future. I could not sleep. I was being blackmailed at the time, and it was going on for a long time. I was too scared to go to the police or reach out for help. I was lying in my student halls one night, I wasn’t feeling too well at the time, and I just could not sleep, I was so exhausted.

I don’t know where Samaritans number came from, but I called them. I’ll never forget that call. All I wanted was to sleep. The volunteer didn’t go into everything, like ‘Oh what’s happened?’ She just really helped me. I actually fell asleep on the phone and I felt so much better – that was what I needed. I was really grateful that I could talk it out. I know friends and family have contacted Samaritans and they have felt much better after having those conversations, too.

I think I’ve always been a big listener; I’ve always been there for my friends. I remember wanting to give back. I’d just moved home from London and wanted to do something with my life and to help contribute to society. I decided to volunteer for Samaritans as I really believe in the cause – in what Samaritans does. I believe how we support people who contact us, benefits them – you can hear it. 

It was initially hard not to give advice, but it clicked quite quickly for me. Thinking back to when I’ve given advice to friends in the past, the best times have been when I actually haven’t given them much advice at all and they’ve made decisions for themselves. No one wants to be lectured, and we’ve all been there when someone has given us advice and we’ve felt, ‘your intentions are well but mate, you’re not in my situation.’ I think people feel better about themselves and more empowered when they come to their own conclusions.

You have to deal with tough situations, but all that training helps you become an even better listener. What I’ve learnt, I take it home to be there for my family and friends. I’ve noticed an incredible difference in how I communicate and how I deal with certain situations, and how I support people.