Personal experiences of contacting Samaritans

Kristian called Samaritans late one evening after he had taken steps to end his life.

'I found it hard to speak to begin with, but the guy on the other end of the phone waited. When I’d had a chance to gather my thoughts I began to unload and it felt like a huge weight was lifted from me.

'After that call my whole life changed. I sought professional help and was referred for counselling, which has been really helpful.

'Looking back now I wish I had called sooner. I didn’t have to get to a crisis point and I would tell anyone going through something similar to call now, you won’t regret it.

'I had no idea that someone listening to me would have such an impact. It saved my life.'

In her second year of university, Nicola noticed changes in how she was feeling.

‘I have always been hard-working but somehow, academic challenges seemed overwhelming. My grades and attendance record remained strong, but I constantly felt I was falling behind and was totally preoccupied with thoughts of failure.’

‘The change in you that is brought about by depression is incredibly confusing. There is no let up, no reprieve just withdrawal, locking you into the way you feel by isolating you from people who care about you the most.’

‘My close friends and boyfriend started to see that something was very wrong. I spent hours and hours alone in my bedroom and stopped socialising almost completely.

'I went to see my GP who was very supportive. However, it was Samaritans that helped the most. They helped me work out a support plan that I still use to this day.

‘I can spot the warning signs and take steps that I know will improve my mood. I don’t have a "silver bullet" or "magic panacea" but I can stop my mood sinking lower and lower.’

Darran, 37, first came to Samaritans for help, having struggled with alcohol in the past and been homeless.

'When I had been at my lowest, I had used the Samaritans and they were a massive help. Half of the battle when you find yourself in these positions is just being listened to, properly listened to.'

Originally from Liverpool, Darran moved to Bury to complete a 12-month treatment plan as part of a therapeutic community for people in addiction.

After the treatment, Darran had two aims – to work with the Samaritans and to study for a degree at university. He has achieved both.

'So, I applied to be a listener, which was quite a rigorous process. There is intensive training, probably over a six-month period all told. You need to be non-judgemental, open-minded and, above all, a good listener.'

As part of his work, Darran has represented Samaritans on Radio 4. Darran also attended Buckingham Prince Charles’ 70th birthday celebration at Buckingham Palace.

After a mental health breakdown, losing his job and experiencing a break up, David was finding it really hard to cope.

'During Christmas I really began to struggle. I had my family around me, but it was difficult to talk to them and I didn’t want to worry them.

'A psychiatrist I’d been seeing because of my breakdown had given me Samaritans number, so I gave it a try.

'It was much easier to talk to a stranger, which is why I called Samaritans. The volunteer I spoke to really calmed me down and helped me see things more clearly.

'I felt totally unemployable because I’d been off for 2 years. I decided I needed to sort my life out, so I started my own catering business which was the best thing I’ve ever done. It’s been a success and I now employ 12 people.

'With the help of medication and counselling, my depression is controlled. It’s only now that I have been diagnosed with depression that I realise how many people suffer from it and don’t talk about it. My advice to people would be to not suffer in silence; talk to someone and get some help.'

Deepak, 32, was born into a loving family of five children.

Nevertheless, he has struggled with a lack of self-worth and feelings of loneliness since he was a child. As an adult, Deepak found himself in an abusive relationship.

'Very quickly, my partner became volatile and hit me. I kept this to myself and it got to me emotionally. Even though I felt this way, I stayed in the relationship as I was dependent on her affection and approval of me.'

One night Deepak broke down and explained everything to his brother. This was when he realised he needed help and decided to call us.

'It was my first real experience of someone just listening to what I had to say – it was something I’d not ever done before, and it gave me the room to explore my feelings.'

This call began Deepak’s slow but important steps to recovery. He began running, reading books on cooking, relationships and how to start a business – which he now has.

'I couldn’t be prouder of what I’ve achieved today'.