Alex's story

Actress Alex Hamilton, 26, supports Samaritans 24:7 fundraising and awareness campaign. Alex called Samaritans for support herself as a 16 year old teenager when she was bullied at school. Here she describes how Samaritans helped her:-

“Throughout my years at High School in Worcestershire I was the victim of bullying - physical and mental.

This was possibly due to me being involved in theatre from an early age both in and outside school and having my picture up at school. I also had very long blonde hair which girls first used to pull - they’d call me ‘Barbie’ from when I was about 13 - and then they began cutting it off.

I told my parents and teachers were told and records kept of the bullying at school and the girls involved were told to stop but it always started up again – both inside and outside school, in the town. I was often followed home by four or five girls.

Even though I was one of the lucky ones, having my family’s complete support, I still blamed myself and felt worthless and alone.

After receiving threatening phone calls, I was cornered in a pub in town by two girls and attacked and had my nose broken. By this time I was 16 and studying for my GCSE’s. I was back at school within only a couple of days and had to be escorted in and out of my exams for my own safety. At no time through all this did I cry. I put up an emotional ‘brick wall’ to everything and refused to ‘give in’. I took my exams and passed 10 GCSE’s at A grades. Through all this we were receiving death threats by ‘phone at home. I was still insisting I didn’t need any help. The girl who had attacked me was taken to court.

Having gone back to school girls attacked a friend of mine and I went to intervene and received broken ribs this time. On this occasion Victim Support urged me to ‘phone Samaritans for some emotional support.

I thought it was just for adults, how could they help me?

I remember I ‘phoned Samaritans in the evening and spoke to a woman who was clearly older than me as I was just 16 – I found this quite comforting. All that I did though was to say that I needed someone to talk to and then I cried almost non-stop for about an hour. It was an emotional release after years of keeping everything locked inside me.

Just speaking to someone who didn’t judge but understood and let me cry, something I’d tried my hardest not to do, gradually allowed me to feel more in control and grow in self confidence.

I called Samaritans again when I heard a lot of girls at school ‘bitching’ about me at school after we’d done our exams. I had just had enough. I came home and went to my room and wouldn’t talk to my mum about it - although my mum’s great and more like my best friend. She understood the situation so well and just put the ‘phone next to me so that I could call Samaritans alone. I did and on that occasion just chatted generally, again to a woman about school, whether I would go back to school, what my plans were for the future and my hopes in general. I didn’t really talk about the bullying as such but talking just really helped me lose that tension again.

I did go back to school but only for four months or so and then decided it was time to move on. I had spent the whole of that summer not leaving home. I do still feel some fear going back to my home town - although I’ve since had some apologies from some of those girls about what they put me through all those years ago.

Since leaving school I’ve been to college, toured the UK in theatre productions, taken the lead in a feature film - “Movies” and spent a year at one of the best acting conservatories in New York City, my place there being one of only 100 given to people from all over the world who went to audition, and now, 10 years on, aged 26, I’m about to embark on an exciting trip to Australia where I have secured an acting agent and castings.

To do all of these things has taken strength and I truly believe I wouldn’t have been able to believe in myself had I not shared my feelings as a scared and empty 16 year old girl.

I am in full support of the Samaritans 24:7 campaign and hope more and more young people - whether they are being bullied or just need that someone to listen - will call or email and start that healing process.

24 hours a day there is someone who cares about you, someone who wants you to achieve your dreams and have the bright and fulfilling future you deserve.”

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