Bouncing back from the baby blues

 

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While for many the months after giving birth to a baby count among the happiest times of their life, for thousands of mothers this is not the case.

The majority of women are hit by baby blues in the immediate aftermath of taking their newborn home as they learn to cope with this new addition to their life.

But for approximately ten per cent of new mums, these feelings become more acute and long-lasting, so much so that it prevents them from bonding with their baby. And more severe symptoms are felt by one in 500 women who have recently given birth.

Post-natal depression can hit any woman from any walk of life at any time and the effects of this can vary hugely. While some mothers suffer from irritability, tiredness and loss of appetite, others struggle so much to bond with their child that suicidal thoughts begin to creep in.

According to Deborah Morgan-Graham of support charity Perinatal Illness UK, each year sees 40 new mothers kill themselves as a result of this condition.

Speaking to the Mirror in January she said: "Having a baby brings a big shock and women can have thoughts about killing themselves or their child.

"But it's not that they want to harm their baby - they just think they are such bad mothers [they] see no way out."

For many mums these feelings escalate as they fail to talk to anyone about them. This could be for a variety of reasons. Some may not realise they have a problem at all, while others are concerned that if their feelings are voiced they could risk being separated from their child.

But this is a misguided view, said Liz Wise, a counsellor for women with post-natal depression who suffered from the condition after both her pregnancies.

"Health professionals are there to help mothers recover and to support them, not to split up families at all," she stated.

Research due to be published in the Bipolar Disorders journal suggests that the number of women suffering from post-natal depression could be vastly underestimated.

Birmingham University research fellow Jessica Heron conducted the study that found as many as 17,250 late-onset cases of the condition go undetected each year in the UK alone.

Without treatment, the symptoms of post-natal depression can persist for months and in extreme cases even longer. This is why it is "vital" that a professional is consulted as soon as possible, Liz added.

While Liz went to see a doctor a week after she had symptoms with her first daughter and was subsequently referred to a psychiatrist, it took Emmy Smith a lot longer to seek help.

She believes she "slipped through the loop" when she began displaying symptoms of post-natal depression after the birth of her first baby.

When Liz went to see her GP and later a psychiatrist, her irrational thoughts concerned her so much that she feared she was schizophrenic and it took healthcare professionals to reassure her otherwise.

But in Emmy's case, her symptoms were not as extreme - she simply knew she felt "terrible".

"I didn't feel suicidal and I didn't want to harm my children," she noted, adding that her health visitor failed to identify any problems because she was not an "extreme" and was also not "entirely honest" about her feelings.

But once Emmy - who had spent her life looking forward to becoming a mother - sought help six months after her baby's birth and more swiftly after the birth of her second daughter, her life took a turn for the better.

New mothers who are feeling in any way not their "pre-baby self", should immediately go and see a doctor, she advised, noting that they are "totally and utterly objective".

"Anybody can get [post-natal depression], it can come in any degree of severity, you won't necessarily know that you've got it, you'll just know that you feel terrible.

"And really importantly, the earlier you get help the sooner you can definitely, without question, get yourself back again," added Emmy, who set up the website trulyme.co.uk to help women who are experiencing a number of difficulties to share their stories and get back on their feet after recovering.

In addition to speaking to someone about any concerns that they may have after the birth of their child, it is important that new mums look after themselves in other ways.

Counsellor Liz Smith advises that those suffering from post-natal depression get plenty of rest. This is something that can be very difficult when a newborn baby is inevitably on the scene - and this is why accepting help from others is vital.

"A lot of women won't because it will add to their feelings of failure that they're not a good enough mother," she noted, but added that these mothers should take heart that all new mums need to ask for help sometimes.

Those with the condition should also ensure they eat foods that will give them energy rather than those that will drain them, opting for carbohydrates over sugary foods, advised Liz.

Finally it is vital that post-natal depression sufferers know that there is light at the end of the tunnel. For Emmy, it provided her with a renewed perspective on life and resulted in a complete change of direction.

In her words: "I never thought I would recover and my life is now better than ever."

 

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